My goal is to instill these 8 Core Values: Trustworthy, Benevolent, Strong Work Ethics, Overcome Adversity, Love Yourself, Productive Communication, Accountable, Effective Emotions.
2) Benevolence. In its purest form: kind, generous, doing good. Seems simple enough.
Digging deeper: compassionate, concerned for others, selfless acts of good deeds, merciful, positive actions that result in positive consequences. Now this is where it becomes difficult to instill into the next generation.
Have you allowed the children in your life to witness you giving up your desires to perform good deeds for others? Have you stayed positive at all times, bringing forth positive outcomes? Well, I surely haven’t lived my life as a benevolent human being! Being so concerned about other people judging me, I had altered my parenting style to accommodate what I thought would fit what they deemed acceptable, and not only that; I have caught myself judging other caregivers. Instead of asking another parent if they would like my help and assisting them on their terms, I have said, “I can’t believe they are allowing their child to behave like that!” or given them my critical advice, as if I knew their child and lived in their circumstances. And not to mention my selfish declarations, “I can barely afford my own car payment; how can I be expected to give to other people?!”
Prior to embarking on this mission, I did not know that what I was doing was bringing forth negativity into the lives of my little people. I had to first accept that (sigh) I am not a perfect parent. This was a flaw in my character as a human being.
NO ONE IS PERFECT! However, once I concluded that I wanted the gift of benevolence given to my little people, I was able to begin my conscious effort to correct my behaviors. Instead of my critical words regarding others, I began to say things like, “It’s ok; I take care of many children. I know it can be tough with so many judging eyes on you. I can hold your groceries if you want a few moments to talk with your little one. Sometimes my little people let the whole world hear their voice until I take a minute to acknowledge their words.” And instead of saying that we have no money to offer, I began teaching the children that we have other things to give, like volunteering our time, making knitted hats, or simply giving our positivity and kindness to others.
Let me say that again: NO ONE IS PERFECT. On this journey I have discovered that I am not always the best, and I sometimes have to accept that, though every day is another chance for me to be an image of what I hope they see.
Peaches & Pits 