My goal is to instill these 8 Core Values: Trustworthy, Benevolent, Strong Work Ethics, Overcome Adversity, Love Yourself, Productive Communication, Accountable, Effective Emotions.
3) Strong Work Ethics. What does that mean to a child? Most caregivers cannot take their children to work with them, so mirroring yourself is somewhat impossible. We must also consider the fact that each of us is motivated by a variety of goals, so we must consider what motivates each of the children we are raising.
Working hard while in their presence does not always turn out for the best. To give even more examples of how every child perceives things differently: Lylah saw how hard I worked around the house…that meant she didn’t have to do anything to contribute to the chores. Raymoria saw me struggle and wanted to help. Wyatt looked up to his big sisters and was torn between seeing how much fun it was to get out of chores and wanting to help others so it would be an occasional support in the work to be done.
Feelings of guilt had led me to “making up for it” in other ways. Even the things that were out of my control. I would have to say that looking back, that has been one of my worst mistakes over the years. If I relied too much on one of the children, or if they had gone through some difficult times, I would try to make up for it by “giving them a break”, that led to what I feel is characteristics of entitlement. Though that was not the outcome of all the cubs, some of them turned that into strong work ethics and more compassionate towards others.
Know your cubs! It is in our best interest to understand the people we care about and work with them, not against them just because we feel it is the best way to instill our work ethics.
Having several distinct personalities, with different incentives, and trying to still have a fair playing field, I devised a game board. The cubs had to participate in creating the board, that way they were invested in the daily activities. With a large poster board, the cubs made 1inX1in squares that snaked back and forth, totally the number of school days for the year. Some squares were simply colored in, while other squares had special instructions; that’s where the investment part comes in. We discussed as a group what they would like to have for winning the game, and for the special squares. They decided that the end of the game will be a trip to a small local amusement park. The special spaces were more focused on each child; free days, pick a prize, art day, library field trips, and pick the meal were some of their choices. Each child that finished all of their schoolwork for the day and completed housework (based on their age and ability) placed their game piece (a sticker) on the square for the day.
With a few flaws in the design, I have discovered that next year I will have to make some minor alterations! Though I have seen major improvement in their desire to strengthen their work ethics. They have all grown to be proud of their diligence, which goes beyond simply receiving rewards for their efforts.
Peaches & Pits 